Saturday, March 20, 2010

Goodnight Gracie

It should be pretty obvious by now that I don't blog much anymore and I don't read much of anyone else's blog. Life is busy and this blog is no longer the productive outlet it once was. I'll leave it up for now. Hopefully there are some good bits of information in there that might be useful to someone. Good luck to you all in finding what you are searching for.

Friday, January 8, 2010


This post is in response to blog posts and comments made by various bloggers. I am finding there is a mentality among some of "this is how I think and if you don't like it, screw you." I get it, I have been there. I spent the first 21 years of my life with that attitude. But I would like to encourage more of an openness and willingness to accept those of varying opinions, even those of what might be described as a wrong or harmful opinion.

I believe that we, as a community, are looking for acceptance. We want some sort of validation from those we love and also from the general public, whether it be by accepting gay marriage, or allowing gays in the military, or even something as simple as being open about one's sexuality without fear of repercussion. We march on Washington for our rights, yet we scrutinize and criticize the words and actions of those who disagree with us. We become everything we dislike about our oppressors (ok, oppressors is a pretty strong word, but doesn't it add a little flair!).

To those who are of the opinion, "If they don't like who I am then I probably don't want them as a friend anyway," think of the times that someone close to you made an offensive comment simply because they did not know any better. Did we love them or leave them? We can not EXPECT change. We must FIGHT for change. We must show COMPASSION to those who despise us the most. We must LOVE those who do not love us. We must BREAK DOWN THE WALLS that we are continuing to build.

I had an experience recently where one of my friends made a comment that I took great offense to. At first, I lashed out. I couldn't believe the inappropriateness. But after thinking about it for a day or so, I realized that my friend was merely making a comment based on her perception of the situation within her reality. I begged for forgiveness of my lashing out and when we further discussed her comment, it turns out that her intention of the comment was far different from my interpretation of the comment. If I had written this friend off immediately, neither of us would have had the opportunity to learn and grow from each other. We educated each other by working through our differences with love and respect.

I encourage each of you in your personal endeavors to maintain a spirit of love and understanding. I hope that we can each become positive influences in the lives of those around us.

Sunday, August 16, 2009


Every now and again I just need a reminder of what I know. I know that God exists. I know that he loves me. I know that he loves you. I know that Christ died for all sin, including my sins. I know that I can be forgiven. I know that prayer is real and that we can speak with God on a very personal level and receive the answers and strength we seek.

To those who have given up or lost hope or feel like they are fighting a losing battle, "fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness." (Isaiah 41:10)

Wow, today isn't even fast sunday...which reminds me, I'm hungry. Later.

Sunday, May 31, 2009

I've been recruited by...Clint??

Okay, I admit it. I'm a little jealous. I'm a little jealous of all the moho's that gathered at Scott and Sarah's yesterday for some gay movie watching. I hope you had fun, but for my sake, just tell me it was miserable so that my jealousy can be quelled.

In order to compensate for my unavailability to fly to UT, I decided to have my own gay movie watching night. About four months ago, Clint blogged about the movie Milk. For those of you not familiar, it is about Harvey Milk, an openly gay elected official in San Francisco during the 1970's. When I first read Clint's post, I wasn't too enthralled by the power of the message. It seemed like a nice post and all, but it didn't move me to stand up and proclaim my gayness from a watchtower. But it did intrigue me enough to want to watch the movie.

After watching the movie, though, the power of the message truly comes to light. The main political battle that Milk and his supporters fought against was protecting the basic rights of homosexuals. More specifically, maintaining laws that protect an individual from losing their job solely on the basis of sexuality. Perceptions, stereotypes and myths about homosexuals were rampant among the general population. Harvey Milk knew that the best way to change how people felt about the gay population was to show every person that someone in their life they know and love is gay. And so he says:

“On this anniversary of Stonewall, I ask my gay sisters and brothers to make the commitment to fight. For themselves, for their freedom, for their country ... We will not win our rights by staying quietly in our closets ... We are coming out to fight the lies, the myths, the distortions. We are coming out to tell the truths about gays, for I am tired of the conspiracy of silence, so I'm going to talk about it. And I want you to talk about it. You must come out. Come out to your parents, your relatives.”

I have been going back and forth a lot lately as to how open I want to be with my sexuality. Some days I don't want anyone to know, other days I want to tell everyone in sight. It's pretty safe to say that I'll end up somewhere in the middle. But I do think it's important to let at least those close to me know that I am gay. Even some members of my family and close friends hold misconceptions of what it means to be gay. If I can help to cultivate understanding and tolerance, than I am more than happy to out myself to those who need that understanding.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Would you like bacon with that?

Funny moment today. I recently discovered the joy of Burger King, especially the Whopper. I stopped there for lunch today and the drive thru line was long, so I actually took the time to read the menu. Here's a little excerpt of what I read:

Whopper $2.29
Some other Burger $2.69
Another Burger $2.49
(and hidden in the lower left hand corner of the menu)
Veggie Burger $2.29
Add cheese $0.50
Add bacon $0.50

Someone in marketing must not have read over this display because I don't know anyone ordering a veggie burger with cheese and bacon.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Inside Out

My life has been hectic lately. My mind has been all over the place. But it reached a new peak this last Thursday. Around 11:00 am, during my first bathroom break of the day, I realized that I was wearing my underwear inside out. I know some guys do that on purpose, in order to get an extra day or two of mileage before having to do laundry. But I am not one of those people. I think I'm only one or two hectic levels away from forgetting to put on my pants before leaving the house. If I do that, hopefully I will have my underwear on the right way. Boy would that be embarrassing if people saw me with my underwear inside out. :)

For all of you watching GC this weekend, I hope you get something good out of it. If anything stands out, let me know.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

The Peacegiver

A wonderful friend of mine gave me book for Christmas called The Peacegiver, by James L. Ferrell. (Side note: Said friend did not warn me well enough in advance that she was getting me a gift, whereby I had nothing to give her in return. I still feel bad about that one. Good thing she knows I love her.) She is a die-hard bookworm and I am not much of a reader. But if she was recommending it, than read it I shall.

It only took me about 3 months to get through the 200 page book. I'd say I made pretty good time. The first half of the book was terrible. Well, not terrible, but I wanted to pull the lead character out of the book and strangle him for being whiny. Dude, you are talking to your dead grandfather...shut up and listen to the man!!

Anyway, the last section is about the Atonement. The whiny guy, not so whiny at this point in the book, and his grandfather are witnessing the scene in the Garden of Gethsemane. It contained beautifully descriptive insights about what exactly the Savior did for us. I want to recite a few paragraphs for you of the grandfather speaking to his grandson:

"This night in Gethsemane, the Lord is taking upon himself all of the specific chains that bind and lead you captive. [...] [H]e will provide the way for you to break free [...]. Your rage, your disappointment, your despair--the Lord will overcome all tonight and forge for you a new heart--clean, pure, undefiled, free.

And he does the same for all--the addict, the abuser, the chronic complainer, those whose spirits are depressed. His struggle tonight is for all of mankind, but only because it was for each of us, individually and specifically.

[...] [P]raise be to God! [...] The Savior has withstood in the aggregate what no man has been able to withstand individually: He refused to submit to Satan's will even though he was fully subject to it. Even with all the mortal effects of our sins heaped upon and pulling at him, and with Satan and his hosts attempting to drag him down by that power to sin, the Savior was able to withstand and resist.

The captivity of sin has been broken! The Lord God Almighty has risen with healing in his wings. He stretches forth his arms to the world, feeling after them with his Holy Spirit. He comes to each of us, posing the question he posed to Jonah, pleading with us, as Abigail did, to forgive, and literally dying to give us his Spirit and the new heart he has forged that will free us from the chains of our sins. If we harden not our hearts and stiffen not our necks against him, he will facilitate the breaking of our sinful, stony hearts and will give us what Ezekiel called his new heart of flesh, saving us from all our uncleannesses. This is the miracle of Gethsemane."

I make mistakes daily. Sometimes hourly. I am so grateful to know that someone loves me so much that he was willing to perform an act of incomprehensible agony just to give me the opportunity to become clean. I think I owe it to my Savior to ensure that the opportunity is not wasted.